FC United of Manchester 0 – 1 Halifax Town; 11/12/10.

FC United of Manchester 0 – 1 Halifax Town; 11/12/10.

It's a freezing Wednesday night at Gigg Lane and Football Club United of Manchester are playing the biggest game in their short history. They are contending with Brighton and Hove Albion in a replay of the second round of the FA Cup, having drawn at their place. Each opportunity in this cup is another cup final. Through the flares and dark cold a large banner billows as much as it can when its four corners are pinned to a barrier. "Making Friends Not Millionaires" is the maxim.

If FC United made millionaires in the way they make friends then they'd be staring liquidation in the face.

Us at FC Halifax Town have been rubbing our hands together for this one. Let's put it coyly: this isn't because we both have support that outnumbers all others in the league. Nah, we're just excited to have a game on after three weeks. With Aspin giving the boys a lot of running exercises at training as pitches in the Northern Premier League freeze over, maybe they want to do something more interactive also.

It's been another magical FA Cup run for a handful of clubs. Tipton Town took on Carlisle after getting through six rounds. Hythe Town likewise, bowing out to Hereford. Havant & Waterlooville got another good FA Cup deal for their money before falling to Droylsden, who threw away a 2–0 lead at Leyton Orient, the O's coming back in extra-time to net eight. Droylsden are one of the most central teams in Manchester, though not many professed City or United fans would recognise their name.

 

FC United did remarkably well, too. They got through five rounds. Even more remarkably still perhaps, they eclipsed all other tales of heady FA Cup dreams. They're out of it now of course after losing 4–0 on Wednesday, but they're not yet out of the relegation zones. A commentator during the Brighton game explained this may be down to "their style being unsuited for the Northern League." That's a bit like saying Ann Widdecombe isn't suited for the sexuality of the modern man.

The relation is this: Halifax Town never had a choice when we lost everything. With opaque staffing and declining performances we could only sit and spectate. The borough of Calderdale wasn't behind its club and still is antipathetic for the most part, so even when we rose from the ashes, a supporter-owned club was out of the question. We're lucky to have the most open management in years. We're lucky to have a large stadium that stands tall and in decent nick for one of the first times ever. And we're lucky to have a team and management team that put the time and effort into the club that we as fans do. So in this match, the biggest in the non-league this weekend, FC United were playing a team of similar support. That's what the neutrals came for still, but they stayed for the FC United story. On the other side of the halfway line stands a team representing a club once known as the worst in the league, and there isn't a team in this league who don't fear us as opposition. For those actually involved in the Evo-Stik Premier, we're the ones to watch. Rightly so, as even FC United, who despite achy legs put in one of their big efforts, failed to match up to a Town line-up, our excuses plentiful but aside.

Over to more pressing matters, an entourage of Shaymen rocketed over the Pennines for a bit of fun. Sources over here put it at 750, sources over there put it at 937, but for however many it was we were raring for another league game. Singing as we approached the turnstiles helped too. I gave the fella with the programmes £2 for a neatly laid-out but thin issue that could be devoured within five minutes with great respects to their community efforts. It should be noted that fans like him were cheerful and chatty. As many top FC United fans there are about, they're sadly eclipsed by the endlessly cocky and hostile sub-Leeds United nutters who soil a great (not far from perfect!) concept for club management. Notable in the programme is the charitable heart it places in of Greater Manchester. Our club isn't far off in this respect at all, but it creates FC United as a social conscience. I'd wager those who perspire for the club and its community work and those who make this a reason to be arrogant scumbags are two completely separate factions. All the best to the programme guys and the FC United fan who extended himself to offering me a lift for this game, and may they inherit their club over the worst sorts. True fans: masses of warm, firm handshakes and luck wishes.

 

FC United came out from the changing rooms as a nasty shock, and a departure from the eleven dry farts I saw at the Horsfall Stadium a few months ago. They forced an attack early on with a narrow miss, and missed out on a fuzzy penalty call as Liam Hogan and their Carlos Roca nearly collided. This was more like the FC United I saw on Sky against Rochdale and Brighton. They were up for it, but when they weren't attacking we were. Guaranteed. Garner laid on very nicely for Deano who skied it at close range a few minutes later. Following on from that, Scott Phelan hit the post. If the times Phelan hit the post and the times he scored were proportional to the area of the posts and the net itself, goalposts would be about two metres wide. He'll get them in soon enough.

Not the best but not the most worrisome showing for us in the first half, then. As Deano went off injured, a bit more bite came into our attack. Just as I remembered the words I'd been given: "FC United cannot deal with crosses into the box," Metcalfe did just that. The ultimate finishing move for a goalie is a deflection of a quick ball which came courtesy of Garner's head, and the ball sizzled in the right corner. The Cemetery End erupted and carried on at such a volume for a good while.

 

One goal's never enough though, especially in lower-league football. The ensuing 40 minutes were some of the most tense I've seen, and across the stand our very frequent chanting interchanged with much chewing of fingernails. We forced more attacks, but when we weren't setting some up they were. Their problems were getting caught offside too often and damn target practice. Ours were . . . target practice, I guess. Sometimes we're great at it, sometimes we're desperate. For a team susceptible to attacks on the wing we didn't do that all too often but if Vardy finished all his one-on-ones he'd be bringing the match ball home for sure. If it weren't 0–1, it'd be 3–4.

The final whistle blew, and three points were counted for the Shaymen, now six points in the lead. If Worksop win their games in hand they would be three points behind us. Beside which, we're simply admiring the view.

FC United of Manchester 0 – 1 Halifax Town; att. 2805

Programme: 5/10
Talent: one stewardess; a Town fan returned to get "searched" by her again

Non-partisan entertainment: 8/10  

Independent review

Bury 1 – 2 Peterborough United; 27/11/10.

Bury 1 – 2 Peterborough United; 27/11/10.

 

Saturday morning in Leeds.

I'd been sat refreshing a few screens for too long, and had to catch the train to Halifax before it became too late. Shortly after the train left the station the Bradford Park Avenue match at the Horsfall had been declared off due to a frozen pitch, a quick decision had to be made in order to save Saturday. My second team being Bury, I checked their site to find out there wasn't even a mention of a pitch inspection over in Lancashire, so off we went, getting there a few minutes after kick-off. And no, they haven't got their rose the wrong colour.

I've watched Bury several years more than Halifax Town as it's a joy I've inherited from my father, but this is possibly the longest I've gone without seeing a match of theirs in person. The last time being the two home games against Accrington Stanley at the end of the season and then Shrewsbury in the play-offs as we missed out on automatic promotion by one goal. Both of them had huge crowds of several thousand, and on both of them we lost by the thinnest margin. Halifax's season had been taken off the hob months before, and finished away to Chorley with a final farty bubble of a goalless draw a week or so prior to Accrington. It was good to be back at a spiritual home of mine.

 

Better scores, better times.

The prospect of playing a higher league team hadn't inspired Bury this time around, with one of the lowest attendances of the season clocking in just over 2,500. Peterborough stand at 10th in the third tier; the most relaxing position they've had in a while. I attended the last meeting of the sides at Gigg Lane a few seasons ago in a fourth tier affair where we coolly won 2–0. Posh earned a promotion by the end of the season, followed by another to the Championship. Followed by an unstoppable fall straight down again. Maybe they'll find League One to be the league where they belong after a few intense seasons. For the Shakers, a home draw against a competent team in the league above would potentially show how we would fare if we were to secure promotion this time around.

 

The Boro congregation was nothing to write home about. 186 fans travelling 150 miles or so would be expected of the Shaymen five leagues below. They made themselves heard nonetheless, though their drum overpowered their voices. It was obvious why they outsung us a few times as well. Bury merely covered Peterborough from ripping straight through their midfield and defense and were far too shy to tackle. Posh wasted no time in punishing us as they scored on the 12th minute with Tomlin. We peeked out from their domination a few times in the first half but lacked fundamental desire. Things got worse on the 37th with a hideous goal that rolled in at jogging pace as Sodje (another great game otherwise) sent a header back to goalie Fon Williams with so little power that Mackail-Smith could deflect it from Fon Williams' reach. In the first-half Bury were the weaker team and went forth with counter attacks. Haworth was a tricky dribbler down the wing but Ajose had the chances of the match, including one that was blocked off the line in the first half.

 

Knill must have made some effective changes to the Bury mentality at half-time, as we eventually declared our dominance over the game as Peterborough had done in the first half. It didn't take too long for our defenders to stay just inside of our half to set up chances destined towards the onion bag at the Cemetery End. On the 51st minute, Ryan Lowe smashed one in to make things promising. It's a shame the equaliser never came, but what better chance was there than the powerful strike Ajose delivered, one that Posh goalkeeper Lewis could just about get his hand to. Ajose charged like a bulldog, him and Lowe able to run through Peterborough's middle, and in a half where Bury deserved an equaliser, Ajose deserved the credit for scoring it.

The Gigg Lane family stand is one of great atmosphere where you're free to scream and yelp to your heart's content if need be. No turning around and tutting from the East Stand masses at the Shay here. A highlight was the bringing on of Posh substitue Aaron Davies, which was met by a cry behind me of "AARON PENIS?! THAT'S AN UNFORTUNATE NAME!" Following that, many fans got wound up by a referee (one that, earlier today, declared the match at the Horsfall should be on), who easily commiserated with a few Peterborough midfielders who were quick to fall over at any touch. The real challenge for the Shakers, however, is asserting their authority over league leaders Chesterfield in next week's six-pointer. This weekend neither side let their opponents get away with error and Bury, though down from a 5–0 away win at Lincoln City's Sincil Bank this Tuesday, look like they have every chance. Let's make it happen.

 

Bury 1 – 2 Peterborough United; att. 2514
Entertainment: 8/10

Strictly come dogging.

Strictly come dogging.

It's been a pretty good week. For me on a personal level, anyway. But then I decided to carry on being a Shayman and get emasculated as Radcliffe Borough came back from two goals behind, and over the course of 20 minutes, changed the tables to make the final score 3–2.

You couldn't really blame them for their utter ecstasy as one of their coaches ran towards the kick-off spot once the third went in as it seemed the last result you would guess. Things felt tentative for Halifax as soon as Radcliffe's first breakthrough attack of the second half found its way scrappily past John Hedge, and two—just two—further breaks put them in front for the first time in the game.



But again, the Shaymen's end wasn't the one with the most divots in as we put in a typical 35-attack display, close on many occasions but clear-cut and in on just two. The first game halfway through the first half and in good time, as the Stockport-loaned goalkeeper Lloyd Rigby went out to clear a ball which found its way to Phelan, who made it fly well over the defenders' heads and to the other side of the nets. The man had yet another top, dedicated game whereas Baker made balls fly, partly down to carrying a bit of hip pain. The second was a close-range header into an open net as the keeper was on the other side near the start of the second half, and several others their keeper managed to save without making errors in his placing. In all though, he was possibly the best I've seen in this league, and won't remain here long. Didn't stand there hopelessly putting on weight like the others, but couldn't kick a ball.

Neil Aspin seemed to make this match a test for a slightly different formation. Marshall came on as a substitute (along with Peers, who deserves 90 minutes at least half the time, adds incredible pace) but those two came all at late time. Andy Lee played left wing and carried the ball very well but didn't get stuck in. Codman wasn't present, and in defense Riley was performing at a low standard.



Anyway, another case of us needing to be more clinical I guess. Even before we start to focus on bringing together our excellent defenders as a tight unit, I suggest attacking like it'll only happen two or three times in a game. Many of our opposition do it, and succeed leaving us bewildered. My second team, Bury, are also great practitioners of it, and training on Radcliffe's pitch maybe Boro' took in this form of play to use today. A game of two halves and the second eventually went their way.



Not without entertainment, though. The order of the five goals could've been a thrill and the work was end-to-end, with very little time to tune off, if ever. Off-pitch entertainment included a very reactionary adolescent member of the steward team. When he bleated "COME ON, BURY!" he received a load of taunts, so he resorted to angrily flapping around his arms inside his oversized bright orange jacket, making chimp-like faces at the Town fans. As the ferocious few stewards walked past the seating again they got chanted at, and the lad seemed visibly distressed, whining "Shut up!" at one person he managed to pick out. Quality stuff, and if anything he should have been more susceptible to banter.

The atmosphere could've been a lot better, but even as fans we lacked a bit of confidence today. Lots of growling really, and an irritating amount sneaking out with a few minutes to go. What was worse though, was the one or two that made their opinions known to our players in a foul way. Many a simian creature takes joy of hitting Halifax when we're down, but with those apes around posing as "fans" and giving our team abuse, the fire is fuelled. I suggest they take a long holiday to Norfolk Island.

The ground filled requirements basically, having enough area behind each goals to suit my yelling needs with a very decent seater stand behind one nets, several concrete steps behind the centre of the other and rickety steel along one side, with a few crush barriers along the other. Utilitarian but with a cabin fever feel. Programme was the weakest all season. It looked like a double glazing leaflet with two articles that could be read in just as many minutes, and wasn't glossy, jto tip Wakefield's in being the fartiest affair of the season.


Ground: 6/10
Pitch: 4/10 (couldn't blame the mud in this weather, but the slope is quite something)
Food: 0/10 (no fecking chips or pies or peas in sight, pathetic)
Programme: 1/10
Entertainment: 9/10 (fantastic for the non-partisan)