Buxton 2 – 1 Halifax Town; 12/03/11.

Buxton 2 – 1 Halifax Town; 12/03/11.

 

Arcadia.

I was going to write a report on this match but felt like extracting the pus from this ingrown toenail of mine instead. Anyway, that's now out of the way, and I have literally no choice but to scribble down this weekend's away day.

Champions versus play-off contenders. No suggestions of a six-pointer however, but one of the tougher matches. And, as the scoreline would suggest, they gave it their all, and we gave it a third at best. Maybe a quarter or a fifth even.

 

 The Bucks do the hokey-cokey.

A goal in the first half would've been good. And of course, the first half is the time that we usually like to spend scoring less goals then the second half, if that makes any sense. The pitch had retained its grass, but could've possibly operated as a motocross dirt-jumping track if it hadn't. The ball would bounce randomly, halfway between a flyaway ball and a rugby ball, and it was a form of football Buxton were better versed in. Débutant Lee Ellington showed presence in the box but even when we got close we seemed not to shoot. Gone was the go-getting Town we see most of the time, in a time of need.

 

Top ground, shame about the result.

We got a penalty that Baker obviously dispatched even though he appeared nervous, and then a newbie of theirs who I'm told was taken from the local leagues smashed two short-rangers in with quick succession. And that was it. Yes, they were better. They were up for it and little came in their way as they turned around to beat us. I'm erasing the particulars from my mind, apart from the ones worth remembering. These were Buxton's ground, one of the best, overlooking hills and of a nice Conference North standard. The main stand is ample, along with the small stand running right down the opposite touchline, and the terracing at one side also has a decent view. The plastic fork given for my pasty was posh and thick (like David Cameron hurr hurr) which would penetrate any tough crust. The pitch is worth forgetting about as despite being very well-cut it needs a little flattening. As was the Tory advertisement on the hoardings (yuck).

A note on tinpot gallantry though. I only managed to articulate this while having a burger and chips at a takeaway on Monday. Inside the Buxton clubhouse was champagne on Saturday, and the chairman/manager/whatever leapt onto the pitch at full-time to gyrate and stoke the anger of our fans. I wouldn't mind it if, while were at this level, teams could have more grace. Chasetown had grace. Raccy Borough had grace. Some teams just really Cup-Final out. Maybe it feels like that, but often they gloat like all hell. While we are at this level, I'd like it for Halifax Town to be seen as of this level. Otherwise it ingrains a feeling that we're playing tons of FA Cup 1st Rounds/4th Qualifying Rounds against lower league teams on good cup runs, and it makes following Town at this level feel like an annoying weight to drag along. It dresses us up before mocking us for it. I'm not sure if I'm articulating this as well as I did the other night! I could possibly be an odd-fan-out for thinking this way, but I'd just prefer to get along, enjoy the character of many of these places, and while we're in these leagues I want something chummier than the fans vs. opposition fans element we sometimes get, which should be kept inside ultra-moneyed League football before eventually suffocating. Not sure if anyone is following me at this point or even reading this, but it's an encumbrance. There are many reasons for me to believe that if I spend the rest of my life following the Shaymen, that I'd look back to these as the halcyon seasons.

Buxton 2 – 1 Halifax Town; att. 803

Ground: 8/10

Pitch: 5/10
Programme: haven't read yet!
Talent: 4/10
Food: 6/10 (too little of it)
Independent match report - European Football Weekends

Chasevillage 2 – 1 Halifax Town; 28/08/2010.

Chasevillage 2 – 1 Halifax Town; 28/08/2010.

My longest away day since Newcastle Blue Star. It's all going to end in tears.

I would've been very surprised if I were told this scoreline prior to the match rather than watch it unfold in such a brooding fashion. Being told it at half-time, I would be very upset with my team. That's what I am now.



On paper, Chasetown would be practically the easiest away day. Promoted through the play-offs in the clearly inferior southern NPL league can surely only mean a rebound back into the depths. A fate they were getting ready for in their first two defeats before the third game of the season, when we rudely got in the way and lost to them. They were what they were on paper.

Chasetown are a tight ship. They are one of those teams that gets a moment of fame through an excellent FA Cup run, ending with Cardiff City in the third round, 2400 somehow passing through the turnstiles two years ago. If I remember right, a similar number from Chasetown previously made it up to Boundary Park, where they held Oldham Athletic to a draw. I won't lie; I'm not sure if there are that many citizens in Chasetown. It is little but a road in the south Staffordshire green belt, the green belt being a reason why they haven't been able to build a stand higher than 4', with a ground nestled into a wood clearing, threatening their future as a team attracting 350 or so to most games. I've done my research and they've come a little way to get to that. The professed zone for "Unofficial Scholars' News," ChasetownFC on blogspot, reports a game with an attendance of 83 for a mid-August Midland Football Alliance game. The second entry comes midweek, reporting a Chasetown away victory with the tantalising words, "More to follow."

We have sat in anticipation for six years.



A tight, effective ship I continue. A flawless pitch, an "oh, just quickly build a few steps here and there and get it done with" approach to ground-building, and a hint towards the intelligentsia; Staffordshire appoints itself to be "The Creative County" and Chasetown "The Scholars." Not the kind of team for those among us who left school with two GCSEs. You need a 2:1 degree at a Russell-group university at least to make the XI here, which accounts for any lack of youth team.

The first half was like returning home for me. Exactly four months after the last league match. Town cracked Chasetown and by the 20th minute were powering through them, and the goalie was being given endless abuse. Bliss. A Taylor cross perfectly went to Metcalfe's powerful head, which hit it just over, before a little while later Metcalfe squared it to Taylor, and this time with such close-range, the ball only had one place to go. The Shane MacGowan lookalike had his first league goal down.



Not too clinical again, but 1–0 to us at half time. Satisfactory, with great performances up front. Our defense I couldn't see as at these bus stop grounds you have no vantage points for that, and to most supporters of bus stop teams that doesn't matter because they're only attending for a larf and the odd massive match when they play a team like us. Expect the Chase to lose their bank holiday game emphatically.

Then, in the changing rooms, the Chasetown chairman conducted a terrible experiment, where he swapped over the brains from our players with the brains from theirs. Out came a Town team that was unremarkable both individually and as a team, and a tough Chasetown side that magically won every 50-50 and every referee decision. There were a few cries for penalties for us; warranted ones that will have to go down to the highlights for us to tell him so, but ultimately we were shocking.



Now you won't beat anyone with two shots on target, or at least shouldn't expect to beat anyone. Aspin in Friday's 'paper spoke of being clinical and it didn't happen today. Do we really have the skill to put those opportunities away? I would like evidence on Monday.

Chasetown were in many ways tough when they came together, but should be more straightforward when they come to the Shay. I suspect they will be lost without the wind and cold and will be given a good hiding. I'm fairly certain of that. I hope I can be certain of that. If that's the toughest fight they can put into a game, then all we have to rely on is not playing as shambolic as today. Aspin I'm sure will know this, and his grilling is one of the most effective we can expect of a manager. His words imply that he strongly believes in a team that can not only hold it at this level, but be depended on to tear apart certain Black Country squads.



Early days I suppose, but a team missing five players, no matter how key as they were, shouldn't fall down when we have several signings from close season who act in the very least as strong reinforcements. Perhaps we should experiment with a strong XI as close as possible to last season's strongest XI?

On the grill they all go.

Chasetown 2 – 1 Halifax Town; att. 611 (looked like more?)
Ground: 2/10
Pitch: 10/10
Programme: N/A
Talent: 4/10 (fetching physio)
Non-partisan entertainment: 7/10